If you are in pain, emotional or otherwise, it is hard to think of anything else. It is hard to believe it won’t hurt this much and it makes you want to retreat and recoil. I get it.

Someone apologized no more than two weeks ago for causing me pain. It felt akin to telling someone who just went through open heart surgery that he has a “little boo boo.”

Betrayal feels like open heart surgery, but with no anesthesia and no morphine. Deceit comes out of the darkness and strikes you from behind. Regret and remorse circle the drain with nowhere to go.

If you are in pain people will tell you that with time you will heal. While probably true, we are surrounded by gratification that seems better on an immediate basis. Time seems to stand still when in pain and you just need it to feel better and it doesn't cooperate.

Every commercial you see people are in love. Every show is about success. Every person looks so frickin and disgustingly happy. Every song, movie and experience seems only present to remind you of the cause of your pain.

If you are in pain, here is what I will tell you. Just go with it. There will be minutes you feel better and minutes you feel worse. We try to drink, eat, medicate or sleep our way through it but sometimes you just have to feel the pain to get to the other side.

There is the other side. There are great things to look forward to. From deep pain have come great songs, beautiful stories and inspiration. From the strongest resistance a diamond is formed. Lessons are learned from experience and experience leads to growth. New paths, new memories and new relationships can be born out of the darkest of times. Get up every morning, get suited up to face the day and ask for encouragement and support while you are blazing that trail. Listen to someone else. Often, you will find someone that needs your support and that always helps to lessen your pain!

That is what we are here for: F.R.E.E.!

Robin Hesselgesser